


Sleeping At Last

by heekkie



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Alternate Ending, Angst, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Injury Recovery, Lesbians in Space, Sharing a Bed, Slow Burn, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-02
Updated: 2017-06-02
Packaged: 2018-11-08 00:42:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11070468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heekkie/pseuds/heekkie
Summary: Luna Kom Floukru was raised in the tempers and violent waves of war.She was an ocean storm, swells of water, dangerous and yet seemingly beautifulBut when Raven Reyes walked along the sea, oh, the storm insider her fell into something elseSomething calm.Something hopeful.For she knew, she was loved.





	1. Static and Black Rain

**Author's Note:**

> **roughly based going off what should've happened in 4x10 and onwards**  
> First post here, which is weird...I've been on here since 2015, been writing since way before that, but never posted. Please don't judge me, I'm fragile. Thanks.
> 
> This is some seamech content that I've needed but not been able to find anywhere, so I have attempted to put it into words. It doesn't make sense most of the time and I haven't edited or finished it, but I hope you enjoy anyway

**LUNA**

Lightning tore through the sheets of heavy rain, ice cold shards cutting into Luna’s bare skin. The gravel beneath her feet swayed, and she found herself clutching her spear in a desperate attempt to be grounded.  
_From water we are born, to water we return,_ she thought to herself, a calm hum in the roaring storm. Roan stilled by the waters edge, and Luna clutched his metal tag, numb fingers struggling to hold tight onto it. _I didn’t want to fight,_ she thought in a fleeting moment, the familiar wash of water drowning her flame. _The sky people pushed me to this._  
Luna stumbled across the gravel, under the shelter of a metal overhang, taking a moment to catch her breath. She’d sworn for a moment, she’d felt, like she was back. All those years ago when she stood across this very arena, facing her brother, and the world had shaken beneath her feet just as it did now. 

—  
_“It won’t come to that” Cal’s face was sombre, hard ocean-grey eyes twisting into something kind, something loving. He shouldn’t be doing this, Luna thought, watching Lexa and some other noviciates poke and test the weight of spears and swords. We’re natblidas._ **If he hopes to be commander…** _Luna shuddered. Only one of them would live to see tomorrows sunrise. This world would turn with or without her._  
“I hope you’re right” She rubbed her fingers over her blade, avoiding his gaze.  
“Don’t worry my sister. The spirit of the commander will chose wisely.” Cal stood up straight, chin high as though he was praying to some unseen force “If it is not meant to be, my sword will not strike true.”  
Luna felt a twinge of guilt twist deep in her stomach, and felt a bit uneasy.  
For she knew, if it came down to it, his words would do nothing to keep him alive. 

_  
_

—

**RAVEN**

 

Raven felt her heart pounding in her chest, her hands slick with sweat as they gripped the radio, nothing but static etching into the silent lab.  
“Bellamy, please, tell me. Talk to me,”  
She took a shaky breath in, just barely whispering the word.  
“Anything”  
She felt the lump in her throat crawl higher, felt the tears building up and threatening to spill. The sterile white world felt unsteady beneath her feet.  
“I can’t talk now, Im sorry, I-“  
The radio buzz cut out, and with that, the anchor tying her gravity back to the centre of this unforgiving world was severed. 

A conclave.  
Raven used her sleeve to wipe away a stray tear, swearing to whatever holy force ruled the stars that she would never get like this again. Never love anyone, no, not the same way she’d loved Finn, or even Sinclair, who’d gone. All too soon, all because of her. All because she’d cared.  
In a dizzy moment, Raven remembered the coat was not her’s at all, no, the sleeves were unfamiliar, ingrained with a scent of honey and sea salt, not the dirt and grit of her earth.  
_Luna._

She stood up, wringing her hands tightly and blinking quickly, as if she could outrun this feeling in the vast expanse of cold-white walls that Becca’s lab gave her.  
_Why would she fight?_  
Raven felt anger swirl inside her, mingling with the fear, creating something she didn’t recognise.  
“Why’d you do it…” she whispered to the rain as it fell outside the wide glass panels, as though it had done her wrong somehow.  
The radiation, it took Floukru, the children and outcasts Luna had raised to rise above the cruelty of war. Luna had watched them die, one by one, just as Raven had watched Finn die. Maybe she understood her grief, something deep inside that twinged when she thought about it. Something that made life not seem worth the fight. Maybe a part of her would do that too. 

Could it have been? Just a few nights ago, Luna had been here, her familiar tender rasp saying something in a foreign language, her wide brown eyes steady in the face of the end of their world.  
A conclave.  
The thoughts swirled too fast as Raven paced the blank lab floor, hands begging for something to do, something to occupy her mind. But the only thing that she could focus on, one image pressing to the front of her mind. 

Rain.  
Just like a few nights ago when she’d woken up from a tangle of nightmares alone, only to find the strange sea girl cupping her face again, warm arms wrapping her in their safety. The same saying, one she didn’t know, but one she wished she could hear again now. The rain had fallen in sheets of ice, and though the world outside was bitterly cold and ending, she almost forgot about it as she fell into Luna’s gentle swaying.

Only, as the image melted and twisted, it wasn’t arms around her, but a blade. A blade covered in Luna’s blood. 

She shook her head, putting the thought on a rocket and shooting it far into space, where she would never see it again.  
The radio crackled, a viciously, loud crackle in the deathly silence.  
Raven gripped it, clutching it close to her chest, as though she was afraid someone would take it away, and that would be the end of all things.  
“Raven? Are you there?”  
Brow creased in confusion, she swallowed the last of her tears and cleared her throat.  
“Clarke? What happened to Bellamy? What’s going on? I-“  
“Raven.” Clarke said firmly, in her typical stern-leader tone. It crinkled the edges of Raven’s patience when she said that. The world could be crumbling and Clarke would find a way to be patronising about it.  
She found it somewhere to calm, for even a second, as a headache threatened to turn her mind to fume and ash.  
“Just,”  
How would she ask such a thing? For Clarke to tell her another person she’d loved was dead? Could she handle another loss?  
“Please. Tell me, tell me everything that happened.”  
There was a painfully weighted pause, before Clarke finally spoke.  
“The conclave, as I’m sure.” She coughed lightly, and something about it felt off to Raven.  
“Bellamy told you. We couldn’t stop Luna from fighting, Raven, you know we made rules, and all of the clans agreed to them” She was too quick to speak, and for a moment Raven was certain the news would come.  
“She was being selfish and not thinking, to volunteer like that.”  
Raven felt her blood boil, in the same way it had when Roan had called Luna a _friekdreina_ , right before her lifeless body as Clarke and the others drained her of her bone marrow.  
“She gave up her blood and her bone marrow, and almost her life, just for a chance to save us when we did nothing to save Floukru.” Raven shot back, her heart pounding in her head again.  
Clarke ignored her refute, and the buzz in the background suggested comforting Raven was not her priority.  
“She fought for Floukru, against Roan, Illian,”  
There was another heavy pause  
“And?” Raven pressed, feeling her chest tighten. She was a good fighter, Raven knew, but who fought for Skaikru?  
“And Octavia.” Clarke breathed the words heftily.  
A stone dropped somewhere within her, and she realised in a haze that she was now sitting on the floor, back pressed to the cold walls.  
“Tell me more than that, Clarke, you have to” The walls dragged any heat from her fragile frame, and she tried to imagine a world where she could be warm again, a world where it didn’t rain all day.  
“Roan died. So did Illian.” Clarke seemed more and more impatient, like something was  
blocking her from talking.  
The Azgeda King, and the farmer, or traitor, she’d never really known. They would be mourned by their own people, or whoever would be left.  
“Clarke, are you there? What else?” Raven couldn’t handle the feeling of her hands shaking any longer. She wanted desperately, nothing more than to curl back into Luna’s arms and watch the rain as it fell.  
An empty thought passed into her mind without permission. Luna could already be gone from this world, the kind and gentle and beautiful girl who had no right to be any of those things as vibrantly as she was. Just like the others, gone from her, all because Skaikru had fallen from the stars and sought havoc and war wherever they’d turned.

“I’m so sorry, Raven.” The radio clicked and whirred, before dying in a heart-wrenching reticence.  
_“Clarke!”_ Raven shouted at it, desperately, knowing full well that it was cut off.  
“Don’t you dare leave me!” She cried out, gripping the radio and shaking it.  
Nothing came, nothing but the sound of her own breath, and the faraway pitter-patter of rain.  
_“They always leave”  
_ Raven buried her face in her hands, quivering in a sea of emotions she hated, ones she didn’t know existed and all that threatened to drown her. She looked out to this sea, like an empty voyager, and felt a burning will to let it swallow her whole. 

 

—

 

**LUNA**

The rumble of the black rain couldn’t shadow the feeling, as she had held Roan’s head beneath the surface, that she was killing her brother all over again.  
_He’s dead,_ she thought plainly, swallowing the lump in her throat, _there's no use crying for him anymore. The dead didn't need anyone's tears. The living were here, and they were hungry. All of a sudden the 11 metal tags at her throat felt too heavy for her shaking frame.  
There is only one more. _

__

Luna ran a quick list in her head, breathing deep in sync with the rain. The last champion, the coward, the reason she fought to end the conclave.  
Octavia kom Skaikru. 

She felt anger boil in her blood in place of fear, felt energy sting her fingers where they gripped the cool steel of her trident. Every sky person she’d known, had treated her like a dog, placing greed over honour and lying their ways into wars that seemed to kill all but their own. All but Raven, who she still felt didn’t belong. It was hard to think someone so remorseful and gentle fell from the same stars as the evil of the sky people. Something about her was different. It reminded her of Cal, sweet, brave Cal, who she killed for nothing.

This fight will end in one way. With Octavia’s head on her trident. The monsters that came from the sky killed her people, her entire clan, she could never forget.  


Luna began to storm through the maze of metal, calmed by the chaos of thunder and rain. If she’d closed her eyes, she could’ve been home, among the roaring ocean storm, watching the steel grey water temper to the swirling dark above.  
Skaikru was born of storms and death, and they will return to it tonight.  
Octavia can’t have gone far. She was last left wounded, afraid, no blood yet on her hands as she cowered from the fight. Just like all sky people. 

Luna knelt to the ground, pressing her fingers to a muddy footprint, the murky water laced with blood. In the fight she’d wounded Octavia, that she knew, but the black rain had seemed to be poison as it touched her skin, much more painful than any wound could be.  
Thunder rumbled, a deep, vicious groan in the night, but it couldn’t hide the crunching of terrified footfalls up ahead.  
_Tonight, we make a new beginning._

Trident poised for a clean swing, she stepped forward in rhythm with the thunder, feeling the ground shake once more. This time, however, she wasn’t afraid. She wouldn’t be afraid any more. 

A painfully obvious clang echoed in the narrow galley as a barrel of tin tumbled over, exactly the direction of the footsteps.  
“I know you’re here, Octavia kom Skaikru” she called over the noise, her dark curls sleek with rain. The only reply to come was a grunt and another clanging of metal, and then silence. Luna froze in caution, trident griped close. 

The end of the galley erupted with noise suddenly, as Octavia staggered out of the metal overpass.  
“You think you’re doing the right thing?” She hissed, barely audible. She was gripping her side with one arm, almost doubled over “You fight for no-one.” Octavia’s dark eyes glared right at her, sickly pale expression flickering with lightning. 

“You’re wrong.” Luna stood tall, just as Cal had, all those years ago, standing across the arena from her.  
“I fight for everyone.” She paced forwards calmly, never letting Octavia slip out of view as she stumbled backwards and hit a smoggy steel wall.  
“Everyone but you, cowards who murdered my clan, who kept me hostage for my blood just so you could survive.” 

Octavia seemed desperate, backed into a corner, scarlet blood falling from her armour faster than the rain drummed on the overhang. “Lincoln would stop you from fighting” She said quickly, grunting as she gripped her side “He would’ve wanted Skaikru to live” 

“Skaikru made him fight for them” Luna seethed, eyes flaming “and _Skaikru guns killed him.”_ She clutched her trident, pressing it closer to Octavia’s chest, just enough so that it barely scraped her skin.

 

“When the rest of the world was at your mercy, you still chose yourselves” She said, emotions swirling inside her like an ocean typhoon. She’d lost her brother, her clan, everything. All it took was a few weeks trapped in a lab to see there was no hope for a new world, no, not where sky people still breathed the grounders air.  
There was hope in other places. In other people. Some people had given her a choice, a reason, a way. Luna felt the spark of it, even now. She would not die tonight. 

“Skaikru doesn’t deserve to be saved.”

In a clap of lightning, she lunged, trident finding it’s anchor in Octavia’s chest.  
“From water we are born,”  
Octavia gasped, gripping the trident head in shock, before Luna ripped it back out again.  
“To water we return.”

She fell, expressionless, black war paint dripping down her face and mingling with the blood and rain that swept the rocky ground.  
Luna thought nothing, building up the walls she hadn’t raised since her first conclave, walls meant for violence and anger. After tonight, she wouldn’t need them anymore.  
She reached forward, cutting the Skaikru tag from Octavia’s neck and gripping it’s metal in her hand. 

12 champions, and she was the only one left alive. She allowed a shaky breath to leave her, wiping her bloody hands on her armour.  
The new world would begin tonight. 

—

The doors burst open, lightning crackling through the opening, wind blowing out half the candles in the room. Gaia, Kane and a handful of grounders shot up in sudden shock, squinting at the rain-slick figure that paced through the door.  
“Octavia?” Kane whispered it, tired from the restless night spent in anticipation. Clarke and Bellamy had dissapeared little over a few hours ago, much to his confusion. 

An exhausted, raspy laugh echoed in the hall, resonating from the blurry figure, and Kane knew, in that instant; Skaikru was over. 

Luna gulped hard, tearing the tags off her neck, watching them glint in the new candlelight. Gasps surfaced quickly, even some stifled sobs as the implications made themselves a home in the tower’s throne room.  
“I win”  
She lifted them to the sky, feeling the joints in her arm sting from the wounds and exertion, but gritting her teeth nonetheless. The room spun beneath her bloodied and battered boots.  
“Floukru wins” Her voice came across as raspy, exhausted even.  
She turned to Gaia, who’s onyx eyes were wide with shock, lips pursed in dutiful congratulations.  
The tags clanged as they hit the floor before her feet, ringing clear in the silence of this haunted room. She’d won. Every person in this room had lost. All but Luna, the little sea girl who’d lost everything. 

Gaia stood up straight, masking the tears forming in her eyes.  
“We will honour the wishes of Floukru, the rightful winner of the conclave.”  
Kane felt a sinking feeling, one he’d never felt before, as his very soul slipped beneath the floor. _Octavia is dead,_ he realised, feeling his heartstrings sever. A passing thought grabbed his attention. _Why is Bellamy not here?_ Octavia was more than a sister to him, she was his blood, his soul. Would he ever recover from this? . Did it matter anymore, truly, when this girl stood before them, had bet humanity’s future and won it in a single night? 

“The bunker is yours.” Gaia lifted her chin to the calls and cries of her people, all the silenced candles of people that would never return and those who would never live to see the next full moon. 

Luna shook her head, searching for the words in the melted steel of her mind, as it tempered and turned her bones to nothing.  
“No, I” She felt the dagger in her skin, before she felt the searing pain that followed, like liquid flame, shooting through every neurone until she fell to the floor. Shouts and rumbling blurring around her, a final image circling her frayed mind, 

Of rain, and a stubborn mechanic.


	2. Stay, Leave

**LUNA**

A gentle swaying beneath, flowing and rolling like the ocean below and the clouds above. Creatures moved, dark and light things, but her eyes never focused on them. In stead she felt lulled, warm air swirling above her and wrapping around her frame like a cocoon. If she’d moved, she could’ve fallen, deep deep down into the nothing below.  
Sound dragged her back to the world like a rusty chain, before the swaying stopped, and she was floating, floating, so high she could touch the stars. 

And then everything became dark

—

Luna woke in soft white sheets to gentle spring light, to the rustling of trees beyond a familiar glass panel. The swaying of water, was too bittersweet to be true, and that was the first thing she noticed. 

The second, was Raven.  
She was wrapped in her familiar red jacket, leaning against the end of the bed, still as the breeze, sleeping away. She looked…peaceful, Luna realised, pain shooting through her back. She looked beautiful. 

Luna was paralysed in something more than pain. In confusion, fear maybe, but something else too. A want, or maybe a need. To stay here in this moment and be still. Maybe things could be still, and the world around them could end, and it wouldn’t matter.  
_How did I get here?_   
She’d sworn that only a few moments ago she’d died, the waves had rushed through her and she’d fallen into its depths with nothing left to offer.  
_How am I here at all?_   
The sky people had no reason to save her. As far as they'd known, she was fighting for their deaths. _Was she really?._ Did she fight against them, against everyone, or for everyone? She'd been saying something before the waves took her, something that she wasn't certain of, like a cautious proposal. Luna had too many questions, all things she didn’t need to understand. She was here, alive by some miracle from the stars themselves, and for now that was enough. 

 

Raven began to stir after a few passing moments , brow creased in sleepy confusion. It was the same look she’d worn while cracking a code or working through a problem in the lab.  
_How long has she been here?_

“Morning, little bird” Luna said weakly, smiling ever so slightly.  
Raven turned her head like a scared animal, eyes wide in surprise, or maybe relief.

“Oh my god” Raven breathed, rushing to the side of the bed as fast as her leg would let her.  
She cradled her hands behind Luna’s back to help lift her up to a sitting position, hands gentle as they’d always been. Her eyes were focused, brows knitted as she exhaustedly scanned the scene, like a little girl figuring out how she’d fix this broken creature. It was only then that Luna realised the wires hooked intricately into her arms, and the black blood circling and mingling with red.  
Raven seemed to notice this at the same time, stopping her busied fingers to look at Luna with a burning worry. 

“Infusion.” She said quietly, allowing a small smile to flash across her face. Luna’s eyes followed the wires from her arms, as they tracked a path directly into Raven’s.  
“You lost too much blood to reject the radiation from the rain alone.”

The space girl was shivering lightly despite the jacket and the sun burning across the last of this earth outside, but some kind of sickly bittersweet smile was still gracing her  
“The others were too busy with Polis and the bunker and war, so,”  
Her bronze skin was glassy with cold sweats.  
“Figured I’d volunteer”  
“You’re _hurting.”_ Luna said it like a question and a fear, mingling like the blood.  
Raven gave an airy laugh in response “Aren’t we all” she mumbled it under her breath, like it wasn’t meant for anyone to hear, but the look in Luna’s eyes made her pause. 

“Ill be fine. I’m more worried about you” She tip-toed around the words, afraid to do anything she’d regret, hurt someone else like the countless times before.  
Luna swallowed the dryness in her throat, feeling the all-to-familiar threat of loss hanging in the air. Her people, her brother, her soul itself. She wouldn’t lose this, too. 

Without a moments notice, she lunged for the wires, meaning to pull it out, maybe to run away; but Raven’s hands were there before she could process them. 

“Luna, look at me” Ravens voice was croaking as the exhaustion tugged at her eyes and threatened to cut her off.  
Luna struggled, but just barely until the pain shot through her back like lightning, stunning her to the spot.  
“Luna? _Luna”_ Panic suddenly filled her voice, and Raven gripped her arms firmly, the only anchor keeping her from floating into the atmosphere. 

Words melted into nothing as they tumbled out, and it wasn’t long until waves were taking her back under again. 

—

At some point, it had started to rain, and Raven had curled up beside her on the white sheets, too clean and perfect for the things they’d seen in this world.  
Luna had absently brushed a piece of hair back from Raven’s face, because she’d known she would be too lost in sleep to notice.  
Raven was still shivering lightly, so she’d wrapped the strange space girl between the too-perfect sheets and her strong arms, though she felt weak.  
She blinked slow and allowed herself a lingering thought  
_Maybe not everyone deserves the end of the world_

And like that, she watched the rain, until she’d fallen back into a restless sleep once again.

—

**RAVEN**

Raven’s numb fingers wrapped around a mug of something bitter and loaded with caffeine. She wasn’t sure if it passed for coffee, or at least not the ones she’d had back at Walden, or the Ark even. Murphy had told her it was _‘good enough’_ and she’d rolled her eyes while walking away, not yet ready to laugh and pretend the world wasn’t about to blow into a million little shards around them. 

Abby and Clarke were above the lab, behind large glass panels talking through something that looked stressful and leader-ly, so she took a shaky sip of her not-coffee and ignored it. Bellamy was outside loading the old Trikru boat with supplies, a nod of thanks that they’d offered it to cross to Becca’s lab, risking their precious time left and their honour by saving Luna. They'd told her when the boat had arrived in the dead of night. Luna's body had failed to reject the radiation, because of wounds, something, Abby and Jackson could'nt agree on. If Luna had died, nobody would win the bunker. The clans would erupt in war. However, that still didn't make the others like her. 

They’d called her a coward for fleeing her conclave, for choosing peace.  
The real cowards were sitting inside a bunker a hundred miles away, while the rest of the world counted down their precious last days and fought to keep them.  
Bellamy passed through the door, eyes cast away from Raven as he stormed directly to the room where Clarke had suddenly stopped talking to Abby. 

_“I can’t believe we’re letting her in here, with us, using our supplies. She’s a murderer” Bellamy’s face was contorted in some kind of grievous rage.  
Raven bit the inside of her cheek, feeling her foot tap away at the ceramic floor anxiously. They didn’t have time for this. _

_“Yeah, well, it’s not as if Octavia wasn’t one too.” Murphy said absently, whittling a stick into something with a shiv, brushing carvings onto the floor carelessly_  
“What would’ve happened if she’d won, anyway.” He continued on, despite the very-present threat of tipping Bellamy off edge.  
“She didn’t fight for Skaikru.” He said the word Skaikru with mock and resent.  
“I say Luna did us a favour.”  
Bellamy stepped close to Murphy, towering over him, dark eyes stern with rage  
“Say that again and I’ll-“  
**“Bellamy” **_Clarke’s unmistakeable voice rang across the lab, and his shoulders relaxed ever so slightly, though the rage didn’t leave his eyes.  
_**** “Whatever it is,” she called from behind a large screen “It’s not important. I need you here, fast.” War and loss had weighed on Clarke, so much that you wouldn’t know Octavia had left this world behind. She was vacant, but maybe just for now.  
Bellamy gritted his teeth, unravelling his fists and walking away without another word.  
Anger didn’t suit him well. 

********

_Murphy had the nerve to smile tiredly “Think we’d last 5 years in a bunker? I’d put it down to maybe 2 or 3 before that time-bomb goes off.” Murphy was repulsive, but she had to admit he was right._  
“Good thing we don’t have a bunker then, huh” Raven added cautiously, watching Clarke place a hand on Bellamy’s shoulder, saying something incoherent that made him seem to shrink in stature.  
“Im gonna go check on Luna.” She said quickly, leg aching as she rose up.  
“Careful Reyes,” Emori seemed to materialise from somewhere behind Murphy, winning smile in place. She was alive, and to her that was all that mattered.  
The grounder winked slyly “There’s magic in grounder blood.”  
She spun John around until they were face-to-face, and Raven rolled her eyes in disgust, having seen enough already. 

She took another swig of the drink.  
Octavia had gone. Maybe Bellamy would never forgive Luna for that. 

—

They continued to visit each other in the rain and dying sunlight. Sometimes Luna was already asleep, and Raven would slip next to her, a part of her wanting to feel warm and…together. She’d trace the tattoo on Luna’s arm, but never ask what it meant.  
She stayed long after the infusion was finished and the depth had returned to Luna’s earthy eyes, though she didn’t need to. After those long final days of running numbers and failed spaceflights, Clarke getting increasingly more stressed and Bellamy more restless, it was nice to feel somewhere different. 

After a few nights Luna could stand up alone, though she would shake like the rocket’s engines turning on. She’d insist to walk alone, until some nights she would join them for dinner, legs crossed on the hard floor by Raven. Murphy and Emori played cards with Monty and Harper, laughing in a strange way. It felt wrong to do nothing, but in these days there was nothing they _could_ do. Bellamy’s head still hung low, and Clarke would sometimes tap him on the shoulder and call him away to somewhere else.  
Luna watched this all happen, caged in her own broken body, suddenly feeling small and guilty. Raven showed her how to make paper cranes. It eased her mind to be doing something. Her fingers worked fast and her face creased in concentration.  
Abby and Clarke were yelling something upstairs that Raven chose not to hear.  
That night Jackson and Abby left for Polis for the final time.  
That night Luna’s room was littered with little birds. 

There was only 2 weeks until the death wave. 

Luna insisted they go to the lake one day and despite the strange looks they were shot as they left, Raven had agreed. She’d justified it a number of ways. They might never get to swim again. Maybe part of her wanted to learn before it was too late. Maybe she deserved something that was easy. 

Luna dove into the waves like some heaven-sent sea creature, coppery curls shining and tangling. She almost smiled as she did it, smooth arms flowing paths around the currents. Raven was a little less elegant. Her leg brace was too heavy, her strokes too choppy, and there was some kind of lingering fear that the ground beneath her would sink further and she’d disappear.

Abby and Jackson had radioed the bad news. Nobody had won the conclave, so they vied to divide the bunker equally in the clans. There was only enough room for 100 of Skaikru. They were going to draw 100 names from a lottery. Luna was the last of Floukru, and Raven a hundred miles from a bunker with only 100 beds, none of them with her name on it. Neither Raven nor Luna knew what to say.  
So they said nothing. 

The next time they went swimming, when the lake was shimmering in unnervingly warm moonlight, she decided to take off the brace. Luna held her as they moved deeper into the waves, until Raven’s toes didn’t touch the ground.  
Her breath escaped her in quick shots.  
“How am I supposed to kick if I can’t feel my legs?” She grunted under her shaky breath, scared she’d be let go and nothing would be able to save her.  
“Breathe, Raven.” Luna whispered it softly into the night, and for a moment Raven might’ve believed in some holy force on this planet.  
“Trust the waves.”  
Raven closed her eyes, gripping Luna’s hand in a death-tight squeeze. She let the water move beneath her in a void of nothingness, let her body float within it.  
_“Trust me.”_

The next morning, while Raven tried to land the shuttle for the 1000th time, the thought had hit her.  
_Why do I trust her?_   
What did she see in Luna that had slipped past her walls so simply, walls that only Finn and Sinclair and a scarce few others had ever seen?  
The thought nagged at her for the rest of the day.


	3. To the Sky, To the Water

**RAVEN**

Raven watched them leave through the window, heavy heart already prepared for the inevitable farewell. Bellamy was already on the boat, Clarke soon following with the others.  
“If you don’t go now you’ll miss your chance at the bunker” She said emptily, hands tapping restlessly at her belt. It was the end of the world. There was no more work to do, no more tears to shed.  
“I’m not leaving you” Luna replied from behind her, stubborn in her beliefs as always.

“If you don’t go you’ll die here, alone.” Raven kept her gaze fixed on the boat as they loaded it, never daring to look at Luna. Something about the sea girl pulled at her emotions, something she hadn’t quite figured out.  
“I wouldn’t be alone.” She replied quietly.

_I’m not doing this, I’m not losing someone else._   
Raven turned her head to Luna, the heat of tears stinging her eyes already.  
“Get out of here, Luna, _go,”_ She snapped harshly, gripping a conflicted Luna by her robe’s collar and pushing her backwards. She could feel it choking her, the draw, the loss.  
“Get out” 

Luna took a cautious step backwards, concern swimming in those earthy eyes. Her face was contorted in a mix of things, like she wanted to fight this, or run away from the deep end, or to refuse to let go. 

“I-“  
“Go.” Raven said firmly, hands shaking as she felt her very self slip through her toes. This was nothing like her, so why did the words she wanted to say never come out as she thought they would? Why couldn’t she find the right words?  
For someone who everyone called so smart, she felt futile. _Maybe I’m destined to die hopeless._

She turned around, looking to the plain white ceiling and blinking away the tears.  
_I’ll die hopeless, right here in this lab._   
“Please.” Raven folded her arms, feeling a cold breeze despite the burning sun. 

Without even looking, she could hear the hurt in Luna’s voice as it’s implications sunk its teeth somewhere deep in Raven’s chest.  
“If that’s what you want.” She said hollowly, rustling as she stepped backwards again. 

Without another word, Luna slipped away, as silently and gracefully as she’d done all those nights ago, when it was just the two of them, rain, and a lost hope for a future. 

 

—

The screen beeped, another hour down as Raven bit her nails to nothing in fear.  
They’re not coming back for me.

Some part of her had been hanging onto a small chance that they’d come back, like they’d radioed a few days ago. Thats stupid, she’d told herself. If they come back, they all die. Bellamy, Clarke, Luna; they chose life. She chose life for them, staying here to work on some absent cure that seemed too little, too late. 

She’d been losing her mind alone in this cold wide lab.  
If she’d had some kind of back up plan, in case she felt like staying here, she would’ve lived in this lab and Becca’s bunker. 

But 5 days alone was enough silence for Raven to know that she would never last 5 years. 

—

The door burst open in a heavy groan, as several masked figures bolted through it, two of them promptly shutting it tightly behind them. The thundering roars of the storm outside scared Raven more than the people did, though she still felt her heart thumping wildly against her ribs.  
The timer was flashing zeroes, drowned out beeping telling them their time was up.  
_What are they doing here? They’re crazy, they’re all going to die, it’s all going to be my fault._

She stood up quickly as the figures made their way down the stairs.  
Raven didn’t need to see the faces to know who they were.  
“Time’s up, so unless you all came here on some grand mission to save the world,”  
One of the figures was approaching her faster than the others, orange suit and dim hood-lights too soft to see who.  
“Or have magically found the cure for radioactive mutation, then you’re-“  
The figure wrapped Raven in a hug, tight arms reaching around her waist, cutting her off mid-sentence.  
In a static filled voice, rough with exhaustion but as familiar as the sun and stars,  
the figure murmured the words  
“We weren’t going anywhere without you, little bird.”  
Raven couldn’t find the strength to pull away, not any more.  
“Well, none of us are going anywhere.” She closed her eyes tightly.  
“Timer’s up, you’d never make it back to the bunker”

“That’s where you’re wrong, Reyes” She heard Murphy call out from the stairs.  
A tall figure who must’ve been Bellamy stepped down the last flight as Luna pulled away, despite never letting go of Raven’s arms.  
“We’re not going back,” He said simply “We’re going up.” 

“Up?” Raven’s brows creased.  
Clarke moved into view, the decision clear as day in her eyes  
“Up to the Ark.”

—

 

“Bellamy, go get Murphy and Monty, we need that generator or we won’t last a week on the ark” Raven called at them from across the room, absently running numbers in her head. Numbers, numbers, it was always numbers, never enough of them.  
Bellamy nodded firmly, focus in his eyes as he put his helmet and turned tail, running to the open lab door.  
Raven paced through the lab, checking every facet of mechanics, anything she’d learnt on the Ark and from Sinclair, but she could never shake the feeling she was missing something. Everyone was depending on her, but without Becca’s code eating up her brain, she felt like half of herself had gone. 

“Has anyone seen Echo?” Raven’s brows furrowed in stress at the spacesuit still hanging up, untouched.  
“On it.” Clarke called back, the graveness never leaving her tone.  
“No, no, wait.” Raven said quickly.  
Time, we’re running out of time, we have to be out of here in 15 minutes or we’ll never launch. The comms are still down.  
“I need you to activate the satellite, it’s right beside the lighthouse, if we don’t have power on the Ark we’ll never dock.”  
Clarke froze  
_I’m sending her to die,_ Raven felt herself begin to shake as she realised this.  
“How much time do I have?” Clarke said, dutiful as she’d always been, forced to lead her people since the 100 first landed on the ground.  
How was she so prepared to leave?  
“10 minutes, maybe less. It’s a 5 minute run both ways.”  
Clarke’s face contorted in ruefulness. “My suit, Raven, if I don’t-“

“I’ll go.”

Raven turned her head to the voice, to see Luna standing tall, chin high and eyes steadfast behind the foggy helmet screen of her helmet.  
“I have nightblood, you said it yourself, I don’t need the suit.”  
Raven felt her chest tighten  
“Black rain, Luna, not the death wave.” Her voice was shifting and tempering in the flood of emotions.  
Luna grabbed Clarke’s cracked helmet, replacing it with her own.  
“I can make it in 10.” She said back, already making a move for the door.  
“Don’t you dare go” Raven followed, her bad leg lagging half a step behind.  
Clarke had already moved off to find Echo, accepting the helmet without another word.  
_I’m not, I can’t-_   
She grabbed Luna’s shoulder just as she was about to leave into the rumbling darkness.  
Luna looked her in the eyes, shaking her head softly  
“I’ve done wrong a thousand times, Raven.” She said, red light flashing streaks across the cracked screen “Let me do this”  
“I’m not losing you, not again” Raven shot back quickly, regretting the words as the tumbled out without permission.  
“I-“  
_I love you._   
The pause was too long, too much for Luna, who’s eyes betrayed the hurt she’d been carrying ever since they’d met, something deeper burning there in place of fear.  
_I love you._   
Luna dashed away, a haze of dusty orange in the crumbling remains of the world. 

—

The timer had passed 10 minutes a few precious breaths ago, but a part of Raven kept holding onto the hope, eyes fixed on the closed doors, feet tapping a deathly-terrified rhythm. _Come on Luna, please, run through those doors, tell me you’ll be here._   
_“Raven,_ we have to go, you said so yourself” Clarke said sternly  
“I think what she means to say, is if we don’t go now, we’ll be blown into a million little dust particles” Murphy yelled back, being gripped tightly by Emori  
“Raven,” Bellamy said, a lot softer than the others  
“I know how you feel, I do, but we have to leave her, or we _all_ die, and her sacrifice meant nothing.” 

Raven swallowed the lump in her throat.  
_He’s right,_ a part of her, the part that had shut itself off after Alie, and Finn and the hell she’d endured over the past, dared to speak up. _We should go._   
“Begin pre-flight corrections” Raven said absently, a stray tear making itself known, however unwelcome the notion that this was it, she was saying final goodbye’s again.  
_I didn’t tell her._   
“Pre flight corrections complete. Manual overdrive locked, shuttle prepared for launch sequence.”  
A red light swirled through the shuttle, and Raven knew it was for the open door. The world trembled and snapped outside the lab, dangerously close to the shuttle.  
_“Now,_ Raven!” Clarke shouted. 

“Close all external hatches.” Raven said quickly, heart sinking like a heavy stone in her chest, as she watched the door close, and her last chance at ever seeing Luna again disintegrate in the heat-bitten winds. 

“Initiate launch sequence.”  
The air in the shuttle was deathly still, as they prepared themselves to launch back into the stars, to leave their home behind once again.  
“Initiating launch sequence, countdown in 5, 4, 3, “ The engines began to shudder and pulse as the rumbling drilled into the walls, competing with the death wave just outside. 

As the shuttle grumbled, preparing to launch, Raven watched the unmoving doors emptily, thinking of all the times she’d meant to say the words  
_I love you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still in progress with this, so bear with me. I'm also probably gonna edit it some time because I'm wellllll aware its in different tenses and p.o.v pronouns because never keep consistency in mind ::))))) 
> 
> I miss Luna, that is all, goodnight


End file.
